March 21, 2011
The sun is shining through the window right now, beating on my face. Previously, I would have been irritated and put a hat on to shield my eyes. Today I just let it shine on me and give me warmth and comfort. It was nice, since soon I will not be able to do that without risks of skin cancer. The radiation therapy, I’ve been told, will cause the skin on my face to become extra sensitive to the sun’s ultra-violet rays. No more driving with the top down I guess unless I’m wrapped up in a mask, ha ha.
Friends really make a difference in my life. Today I received many text and emails from people who are truly my friends. It makes me happy that people care enough to send me little notes and to check up on me. You know who you are and I want you to know you are priceless to me.
It was a very emotional day. I can’t really explain why today more than other days, but I think it had to do with the fact that I was feeling a bit better today, so I started having denial that I was sick with cancer. Like the waves of pain that come upon my head, there were waves of emotions hitting me harder and harder. Later, I started to read a book another friend, who also has cancer, gave to me. In it, it talked about the days of denial that you will have and how these are not necessarily a bad thing, as long as you don’t remain in them continually.
These denial days can be days of rest. So, I will take this day as a day of rest, and hope I also have one tomorrow. I know I have cancer. I know things will get worse before they get better. That’s okay because things will get better.
Today’s verse (for my friends):
Dear friend, I pray that you may enjoy good health and that all may go well with you. 3 John 2